June Newsletter 2014
when confusion reigns - Try a clarity list
I have recently been through a time of confusion. This may account for me being a month behind in my newsletter writing. Did you notice I skipped May? There are changes ahead for Fiona Claire - Sing.Create.Live and as we have discussed before, change can be interesting - and difficult. But it is necessary, and it is visiting my little corner of the world bringing fresh air, new ideas and chasing out the cobwebs, however much I am accustomed to them. There will be more on these changes in future newsletters.
When we feel the push of change on our back but are not sure which way to leap, we can feel resistant, we can find ourselves stuck and procrastinating about taking action. If we are frustrated with our lack of action, we can make judgments of ourselves, our inner critic can start up a familiar tirade: “Come on, what are you waiting for?” “ You’re just being lazy!” it may say. Our feeling of empowerment can start to dwindle, our enthusiasm about new directions can wane under the weight of expectation. Is it really laziness or fear - perhaps we just don’t know what to do?
As creative people living in a land of endless options, we sometimes have too many conflicting needs and desires and instead of having freedom of choice we can become confused and even paralysed. In an effort to do the best thing and avoid mistakes we can react to emotions and thoughts of which we are not consciously aware - we are jumping at shadows.
Taking some time to explore our shadows - the sides of ourselves we keep hidden but that are powerful none the less - can be very useful. Our greatest fears, the things we want but wish we didn’t want and the desires that we deny, need to be looked at as they can be undermining our plans. Bring them to the surface and you may see the different sides more clearly.
But we will still be confused if we have conflicting dreams. If you are creative, you may have a new idea every day about how to approach things and these may all be very precious. But they may not all be possible at once, some of them may even seriously conflict with some core elements of your life that you hold dear, and trying to do everything can lead to confusion, paralysis and pain. Some tough choices have to be made.
A clarity list contains simply the non-negotiable elements of your life. It may be a very short list but it is what you are 100% sure of and your other choices will stem from this list. Use very positive language to really test that these are non-negotiable things. When you state them out loud they will feel strong and positive deep within your body.
Your list may include:
- Where you want to live right now.
- The basic things that you want from work.
- Who you want to be with.
- What your core values are.
- The thing you love to do that makes you happy right now.
- Your most important goals for the future.
- The thing you would regret doing as you lay on your death bed.
These may all change in the future - nothing is guaranteed - but you can be sure about them now. This can help you decided what to do today and what is really not so important.
Ask your self: What do I know, for sure, right now?
Wishing you clarity,
Regards,
Fiona Claire.
Work with me: Individual Counselling, Creativity and Therapeutic Singing Session by appointment. Email: fionaclaire@optusnet.com.au or call 0437 985 132
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